christinawulan

christinawulan

what is friendship?

Friendship is the cooperative and supportive relationship between two or more people. In this sense, the term connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, affection, and respect along with a degree of rendering service to friends in times of need or crisis. Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each other, often to the point of altruism. Their tastes will usually be similar and may converge, and they will share enjoyable activities. They will also engage in mutually helping behavior, such as the exchange of advice and the sharing of hardship. A friend is someone who may often demonstrate reciprocating and reflective behaviors. Yet for some, the practical execution of friendship is little more than the trust that someone will not harm them.

Some peolpe say about friendship

what are they say??

"God grant me the Senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference."

"It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend" (William Blake)

"True friendship is like sound health -- the value of it is seldom known until it is lost" (Charles Caleb Colton)

"Treasure your relationships, not your possessions" (Anthony J. D'Angelo)

"A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature" (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

"A friend is someone who knows all about you and and still likes you"
(Elbert Hubbard)

"Kindness is loving people more than they deserve" (Joseph Joubert)

"Remember, the greatest gift is not found in a store nor under a tree, but in the hearts of true friends"
(Cindy Lew)

"The essence of true friendship is to make allowances for another's little lapses" (David Storey)

"One does not make friends, one recognizes them" (Unknown)

"True friendship is seen through the heart, not through the eyes" (Unknown)

When Friendship Hurts

When Friendship Hurts

Everybody makes mistakes, even our nearest and dearest friends. That is a truism that can't be avoided or changed. So, what do you do when a friend says or does something that hurts you? Here are some tips.

Keep Things In Perspective

Some days I'm much more sensitive than others. The same comment that hit a nerve on Thursday wouldn't have fazed me on Friday, so it’s important to keep things in perspective. Just as we can occasionally have a bad day, so can our friends. Illness, personal problems, or even lack of sleep can cause people to say or do hurtful things unintentionally. Be quick to give your friends the benefit of the doubt. The “mountain out of a molehill syndrome” has wrecked many a friendship.

The Molehills

Small slights and harmless mistakes happen all the time in every type of relationship. Most of them should be ignored. After all, we wouldn't want someone harping on every mistake we make.

But, there are times when you just can't let it go, no matter how small, or the hurtful thing may be something that is done repeatedly. Well in that case, its time to sit down and have a talk with your friend. Most of the time, our friend may not realize we are angry about something that seems so insignificant, but if its going to cause a rift between the two of you, its best to get it out in the open.

The Mountains

Some errors are mountainous when it comes to the kind of pain they cause, and cannot be ignored. A natural reaction to something a friend does that seriously hurts us may be to walk away and wait for an apology.

Of course, every circumstance is different and that may be the best way to handle things, but I find that the closer I am to the friend involved, the more upset I will be about the situation. Why wait around with your feelings all in an uproar? Talk to your friend about what he or she has done as soon as possible. Perhaps the entire incident was a big misunderstanding, perhaps not. Either way, the sooner you get the matter cleared up, the sooner your piece of mind will return.

Forgive and Don't Hold A Grudge

Whether the problem was a minor molehill or an immense mountain, once you've said, “I forgive you”, be true to your word. Forgive your friend, forget the incident, and don't hold a grudge. Realistically, it may be impossible for you to totally forget something that was extremely hurtful. However, if you've truly forgiven your friend for the error, you won't treat him/ her any differently then before the incident, and you'd never bring it up again.

The Unforgivable

Sadly there are times when a friend says or does something to us that we find unforgivable, and that basically spells the end of the friendship. Only you can decide what type of mistake falls into that category, but when you can, be generous with your forgiveness and others will be generous when forgiving you.

Friendship is important to health and happiness of each one of us, but problems will arise. Things will be said and done that are hurtful, but they don't have to derail your friendships. Talk things over, be forgiving, and don't hold a grudge. These simple steps can help you maintain good friendships that can last a lifetime.

The ways to keep friendship forever and always strong

“Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.”

-Oprah Winfrey

I was very lucky last week to meet one of my best friends during school days after about five years. We were very close then though there were other friends too who were close to me. We had developed such a strong relation that I never can't forget even if I wish (No, I never wish). But, for the last five years we were not in contact with each other face to face though were in contact by other means such as email, phone etc.

Personally, with me, it takes some time to develop friendship. But, once done, it remains very strong and forever with almost all. As long as they trust me, I will also trust them. I do not have lot friends but have strong and very close relation with whom I am friend. I do not like seasons and opportunistic friends. Many of them came and went in my life as well. They hurt you in some cases. I understand that life is not always same and we can’t always stay in touch with our friends personally.

OMG, I think I am going to write more about myself. My main point here is not also to talk about importance of our friends because we all know friends are always important in our life. I must share this Sicilian Proverb, which says, “Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty.” What I am going to tell is how to keep your friendship always strong and make long lasting.

Said that, let me start with some qualities of good friendship.

What are the qualities of good friendship?

1. Two friends trust each other in spite of some misunderstandings.

2. They are ready to help each other in any condition.

3. They share whether it is happiness or trouble and try to solve the problem by consulting with each other.

4. They are ready to make understanding if there is any misunderstanding between them.

5. They remain good friend even after long time, change in social, personal, financial status.

How to keep friendship forever and always strong?

There are many ways. These ways may vary from person to person-according to their personality, different status etc. But, I am giving you some general tips you can apply to keep your relation till the end i.e. until we die! (Friends die but friendship never dies)

1. Trust: Trust is such a great quality that is important to keep that relation strong and long lasting in any relation from friendship to that of couples and boy/girlfriend. If you trust the person with whom you have good relation and the other person also trust you in the same way, then you two have strong relation.

Nevertheless, this trust turns into distrust when there come doubts, selfishness etc. If this continued for long-time, any good relation is sure to end and both of you will have to stay at different pole of the earth i.e. one at the North Pole and the other at the South Pole! We definitely do not want this. You may say how I can trust my friend that he/she is always right and he/she will always do well for me. Well again, I say trust your good friend. Because, it is sure good friend will never hurt you.

2. Remember important dates: Remember important dates related to your friend such as his/her Birthday, anniversaries etc. and wish him/her or give a gift he/she will like. In such case, some people consider money as important thing and try to give expensive gifts. However, remember good friendship cannot be compared with money. So, try the one you can afford. You simply can send online greetings for example.

3. Help in troubles: Aristotle has put it rightly, “Misfortune shows those who are not really friends.” I think here also I should not make any more clarification. Only one thing I want to say is always be ready to help your friend in any way and as much as you can.

4. Remain in contact: Sometimes distance makes relation even closer. If you are far from your friend, due to development in technology there are many ways you can remain in contact. You can use email, chat programs, and other social networking sites such as Myspace, Facebook etc. Personally, after college I lost contact with so many of my friends. But, these social networking sites bridged us again. If your friends want to let know your daily activities or other special activity, you can write a blog and share your daily life activities.

5. Share and enjoy: If there is anything that you made happy, share with your friend. Listen to his/her thoughts as well. If he/she has achieved something noticeable that may not be big to you but still is great to him/her, congratulate, and enjoy yourself as well.

6. Maintain healthy competition: I have seen end of good friendship when there existed unhealthy competition between two friends. Though this may not happen in many relations, it is better to keep this idea in mind since it may happen anytime.

7. Monetary exchange: As far as I have seen and happened for me as well, it will be better not to either lend or borrow money with your good friend. Attention should be paid so that your friendship may not end even if you have to do anyway.

Some Friends Are Forever

Sometimes in life,
you find a special friend:
someone who changes your life
by being a part of it.
Someone who makes you laugh
until you can't stop;
someone who makes you believe
that there really is
good in the world.
Someone who convinces you
that there is an unlocked door
just waiting for you to open it.
This is forever friendship...

When you're down,
and the world seems dark and empty,
your forever friends lifts you up in spirit
and make that dark and empty world
suddenly seem bright and full.
Your forever friend gets you through
the hard times, the sad times,
and the confused times.
If you turn and walk across,
your forever friend follows.
If you lose your way,
your forever friend holds your hand
and tells you that
everything is going to be okay.
And if you find such a friend,
you will feel happy and complete,
because you need not worry.
You have a forever friend for life,
and forever has no end.

~ Laurieann Kelly ~

You are my friend and I hope you know that's true.
No matter what happens I will stand by you.
I'll be there for you whenever you need.
To lend you a hand to do a good deed.
So just call on me when you need me my friend.
I will always be there even to the end.

~ unknown ~